Fall into Sleep

Originally uploaded by YourAuntBee.

Well, this is great. Am I really so boring?

My momma called me tonight and we were discussing very important matters. You know . . . something about how there's absolutely no news on either end.

My call-waiting started beeping in. I looked and saw it was my Auntie Doll.

My mom was on a big rant about shoes or something. I decided I would call her when I was done talking to my mom.

Five minutes later, Doll answered the phone by saying "What do you want? Why are you calling?"

Now you may think this rude, but this is pretty much how we treat each other. That's how much we love.

She asked me about something and I responded. Then she didn't answer me.

I thought maybe it was my connection. "Hello?"


"Are you on drugs?"

"No!" she mumbled. "Your uncle is on his cell and won't shut up so I can get some sleep."

That's how much they love. They head to bed so they can talk to other people on the phone.

She asked me about something else and I gave her my response. Then heard nothing but my uncle talking.

"Hello? . . . Are you sure you're not on drugs? . . . Hello?"

Then I realized what happened.

"Did you fall asleep on the phone????"

I had lulled her to sleep with my boringness!

Of course, there was always the danger that I had bored her, not to sleep, but to death!!!

I hung up and proceeded to call every phone in their home. All my calls went unanswered.

Finally, BJ called me back.

"Did she fall asleep???"

"Yes! I looked over and she was asleep with the phone resting on her face!"

Screw lullabies! I'm recording a CD of me talking. I'll make millions!

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