8.28.2006

Poop My Pants And Then I Poop Them Bad

Get!

I may have touched a bit on why I hate Wal-Mart in the past. I'm sure everyone gets tired of hearing how superior Target is.

But it's so true!

Most of you have already heard all my reasons, so I'll skip them.

This weekend, I had to go to Wal-Mart. They have something I need that Target doesn't have. But that doesn't mean I love Target any less, mind you!

So, on Saturday, after work, I braced myself and headed to the dreaded place.

The parking lot was bad enough. Little kids came running from in between parked cars. Other cars sat waiting, blocking everyone's way, while they waited for parking places.

I parked and carefully made my way to the entrance. The doors opened and I halted. There were about ten carts full of crap just sitting there. The "pushers" were waiting for their rides to show up, blocking the entrance while they were at it.

I quickly found what I wanted and got out quickly.

Walking back to my car, I noticed a woman on the other side of the aisle walking toward the store. I also noticed people walking around her. WAAAAAY around her.

The woman didn't seem threatening. She was a short, older woman, carrying some bags and looking like she couldn't find her car. She was dressed in something that looked like a scrub shirt and some white pants.

I thought maybe she had been painting because her white pants were splashed with brown. It seemed as though maybe she had stepped hard into a puddle of brown paint and it had mightily splahed up, clear to her buns and even a little onto the other pant leg.

Then we passed each other.

Now remember, we were on opposite sides of the parking lot aisle. And from that far away, I smelled a scent.

A scent of poo.

And that, my friends, is why I hate Wal-Mart!

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