Rolling on Over

Tonight, I had the rare opportunity to talk to Michael.

I say rare because that boy is a workaholic. He put in eighty-eight hours last week and is on schedule to work at least sixty-five this week.

So, with very few non-sleeping hours left, it's hard to catch him at a good time.

We had a lot to talk about. I told him all about planet earth and he told me about working a lot. And about this dog.

Michael has this friend who has a dog. We'll call him Doggie.

Once, his friend was at his house with Doggie. Doggie decided he was hungry and forced his way into Michael's pantry and ate a bag full of sugar.

"What kind of dog eats sugar???"

"This dog is kind of a spaz."

One weekend, Doggie was staying at Michael's house. Michael had been out and when he came home, his dog, Fedo, was waiting for him at the door with a look on his face as if to say "Hey Dad. I know you're gonna be mad, but I didn't do it. In fact, I had nothing to do with it. You still love me, right?"

Michael walked into his kitchen to see flour all over the floor. Doggie was sitting in the middle of it, covered in flour. "It would've been funny if I didn't have to clean it up."

Last Friday was a holiday for some people and Doggie's mom made some "pot cookies" to celebrate. She had one cookie and was really stoned all day.

Later that night, Michael got a phone call from Doggie's distressed mom. "You'll never believe what I did!"

Apparently, Doggie's mom had gone a little overboard and made two dozen cookies. After eating just the one, she left the rest on a plate in her kitchen.

You can probably guess what happened.

She found Doggie on the floor totally passed out.

She called the vet. "So . . . um . . . you know it's a special day and I kinda made some special cookies and the dog kinda ate all of them . . ."

The dog wouldn't move for two days. On the third day, he threw up. A lot.

Michael thought it served the dog right. "Maybe he's learned his lesson!"

ps--The dog pictured above is not the naughty Doggie. The dog in the photograph is the bar hound Raw and I hung out with during our secret drinks at The Jackpot.