They're Holding Me Ransom

Thumb Wrassler

I'd like to start by saying I'm extra crabby today and have always enjoyed using Amazon in the past.

I've ordered items from Amazon for years. Even back when all they were was a giant bookstore!

One of the best things about Amazon is the "Super Saver Shipping." Spend at least twenty five bucks, and they'll ship your crap for free.

It's also one of the worst parts. Since it's free, they usually take an extra-long time shipping your order. I haven't really felt the extra time was that big of a deal. Usually it's crap I don't need right away and the shipping still seems pretty quick.

The problem I usually have with the Super Saver is the fact that "Hey! For just ten bucks more, I could have this other book and then qualify for free shipping!"

Because otherwise, shipping would only be like $3.99.

A couple of weeks ago, I found myself with an Amazon gift certificate burning a hole in my pocket. On the sixth, I ordered four books. I selected Super Saver Shipping and also asked to have the items grouped into as few packages as possible. Both these choices ensured my shipping would be free.

A few days later, I checked to see if my order had been shipped yet. I was surprised to see that one of the books wasn't actually coming out until June.

I didn't feel like it was a big deal. I ordered a lot of Christmas presents from Amazon. If one thing wasn't available, they still shipped everything else that was in stock.

Soon after, I got an email with the subject "Your Amazon Order Has Shipped!"

I took a look and saw that they had only shipped one book. Strange, indeed.

Turns out, Amazon was only going to send one book and then the other three would ship in June. No matter that two of the three remaining books are showing in stock.

June! Six months from now! Is that not silly?

So I sent an email to Customer Service. I was quite nice, as well as quite bewildered. How is it they could manage to send one book but not three?

I guess I expected to hear back with something along the lines of "Yeah that is pretty silly! Let us fix that for you!"

I woke up cranky today and never really got over it because it seems everyone else hated Monday, too. When I got home, I had a package from Amazon. I was pretty sure everything was going to turn out okay. The packing slip had a little message that said "We've sent this part of your order to ensure quicker service. The other items will ship separately at no additional shipping cost."

But then I opened my email from "Dave" at Amazon.

The email basically told me about how this was all my fault for not only daring to use Super Saver Shipping, but I was also stupid enough to group the items into as few packages as possible.

I'm surprised it didn't say "Hey Stupid! Sign up and start paying for Amazon Prime and this kind of stuff wouldn't happen!"

But no where did "Dave" explain why they sent one book. So I picked up the phone.

Now, I'm not the kind of person who will cuss someone else out on the phone. I probably would have had I spoken to "Dave." But I knew it wasn't Joseph's fault.

So I just rambled like a lunatic instead.

Luckily Joseph was a little more understanding, and I should be reading Alice in a couple of weeks.

I figure if I haven't managed to read it in twenty-nine years, a few more days isn't a big deal.

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