Let it Out Don't Hold It In

On Friday, my Mamo turned twenty-sixty.

She's one of those terribly hard to buy for people. She has what she needs and what you buy her probably isn't going to be right. So this year, we all decided we'd try to get everyone together for her birthday.

And by some miracle we managed it. Well, mostly. All the sons, daughters-in-law, grandkids and great-grandkids, anyway.

We're a ridiculous bunch. Full of beards and immaturity and even a Speedo. And somehow, I think Mamo liked it.

Click on the photo below to see more pictures of this soggy bunch.

License to Ill

Well, I guess it just goes to show I could've had it worse.

If I am supposed to get sick, let me get sick, and I’ll be happy.
May this sickness purify my negative karma
and the sickness of all sentient beings

And the World Just Can't Understand You

When The Boy turned two, I shoved a bunch of presents into a bag with a pirate on the front.

He pointed at the pirate and gave me the "Eh?" that means "What's that?"

"That's a pirate," I told him. "A pirate says 'Arrrr!'"

Of course, he thought this was great fun and for the tree days until his birthday finally arrived, he pointed at the bag and said "Arrr!"

For some reason, this one has really stuck with him. When we play sound guessing games, the pirate always comes up. Of course, since some of his sounds are the same, I often guess incorrectly.

"Arrr!"

"Monster?"

"Nuh!" And he'll shake his head vigorously. "ARRRR!"

"Oh! Pirate!"

Last week, Mom took The Boy to the store to visit Dad. Little Sir was running all around the way he does. People walked in and he took little notice. People laughed at him, tried to talk to him, but he had no time for them.

A bikery kind of guy walked in with a do-rag on his head. The Boy stopped in his tracks and pointed at the man.

"Arrr!

And You Won't Get Laid

This weekend, Raw and I invaded Marcus's place.

We had to stop by The Replay for a couple of drinks. We sat inside since the humidity made it feel like we were swimming,

While we sipped, a bad was setting up in the corner. They wailed a bit, banged on the drums and tuned their guitars. And then they started the show.

"I don't think I'm going to like this band," I told Raw.

"I don't think I can like a band I could've given birth to."

So Whose Matches are Those?

Do you want to know why I didn't go to the doctor for so many years? Let me share with you a conversation I had today.

*RING! RING! RING!*

"Hello."

"Hi this is Whatshername from the Awesome Practice. We have to cancel your appointment today. Dr. L called in sick."

Notice she says "cancel." Not "reschedule." Also, please note this is the second cancellation on the same day as my appointment. Also, please note I have been a patient there for less than a month.

*Sigh.* "Okay . . ."

"What were you coming in for?"

"I had some tests run a couple of weeks ago and we were going to discuss the results and what tests should be next."

"I can get you in with a nurse practitioner. Would she be able to help?"

This is where the whole perturbed attitude set in. "Probably not! She might be able to tell me what the tests say, but I doubt she'd know what to do next!!!"

"Probably not."

"Does Dr. O have an opening?"

"No."

And then silence. No possible options, nothing. And then the anger kicked in.

"Well, I guess you'd better get me in as soon as possible!"

"She doesn't have an opening until the 24th."

Blood pressure. Rising. Please. Help. Me. Out. Lady.

"Okay." Deep breath. "How about Dr. O? Does he have anything sooner?"

"I can get you in with him on the 14th."

There. Was that so difficult? And then there's the trying to get a refill on my prescriptions . . .

Madness Takes Its Toll

Happy 12:34:56 07/08/09!!!

Ooo Eee Ooo Ah Ah

Thank you all for your concern, but I promise I'm doing well.

I feel mostly the same as I did before I went to the hospital. But I never really felt bad until my face decided to swell.

I think everyone around me is freaking out more than I am. I don't know if it hasn't hit me or if I just expected it since I'm old, now. Or maybe it's just that it really doesn't seem like that big of a deal. Like I said, I'm not miserable or anything.

Yes, I went to the doctor. I saw the same guy I saw in the ER. Unfortunately, since they were unable to do the tests while I was in the hospital, he wasn't quite sure where to go.

He decided to do two blood tests. I have no idea what they are, but I go in on Thursday morning to find out the results. How they turn out should point us toward a start. But it's going to be more tests before we ever get to a diagnosis.

I was prepared for this. I've learned from experiences of people I know that those quick House-style diagnoses are not normal.

What I wasn't prepared for was the bills. They just came in today. OUTRAGEOUS!

I don't think I'll check my blood pressure/puls tonight.