Dies Irae, Dies Illa

While I was at home last weekend, I was craving some hash browns.

Saturday night, I told my mom and dad I wanted some for breakfast on Sunday. When I woke up, there were none waiting for me.

"I can go to Sonic to get you some," my mom offered.

I'm sorry but tater tots and hash browns just aren't the same! She just wanted an excuse to get another vanilla Coke.

I stayed until Monday morning. When my dad was trying to get me out of bed, i told him I didn't smell hash browns.

"You're not close enough to the kitchen."

Seems like it was just a ploy to get me up. There was nothing cooking.

Yesterday, I spent some time with Raw and the girls. Her mom made me has browns. I didn't even have to ask for them!

Sophia wasn't as interested in the hash browns as she was in the Pringles. Grandpa Tom was feeding her a chip and said "Body of Christ."

And then I ran because I was pretty sure God was going to smite him.

"Ah. He doesn't have time to punish me for a tiny joke!"

I May not Be Every Mother's Dream for Her Little Girl

I went home this weekend for the Little St Andrews Golf Tournament.

I arrived home late Friday night. Mom was dozing on the couch and Dad was at the Stagg Party. I had brought a lot of stuff so it took me several trips to get everything inside.

"Don't worry," I said to Mom as I walked out the door. "I'll get everything myself."

I came back in with one load. "No really. Don't get up. I've only been driving a few hours. But I'll get everything."

And back I came with another load "I mean, I worked for ten hours today and all, but thanks for your help."

Of course, none of this got my mom up off the couch. Instead, she stood her ground and said "Stop. You sound like your father."

Whatever could she mean?

Before the Cream Sits Out too Long

I am getting so old. I feel like those moms on the commercial that say "I don't think they say 'jiggy' anymore."

I was flipping through channels tonight and stopped on MTV because I saw Robbie Williams. I heart me some Robbie Williams and watched as he showed everyone around his home.

During the break, there was a commercial for the upcoming season of MTV Cribs. They talked about how you'd see this and that and mentioned the "Whips."

Apparently, "whip" is now slang for "car" and I had never heard about it.

I'm so old and lame. Do they still say lame? Probably not.

Bounce it to the Gang

It's starting!

Raw came over to hang out with Jacque and me last night. Look at how happy they are to be together.

I'm trying to be a big girl about it. I even left them alone while I went to pick up dinner. I know. Already, I'm just the errand girl

Sophia and Evan even got along. Last time, they did some arguing and Sophia did some punching.

Of course, there was a little bit of all that this time around. But these days, when Sophia gets mad, she punches something inanimate. Like the cabinet. Or the floor. Or the ball. Or whatever happens to be around.

Evan thought it was funny and would start hitting whatever she was trying to destroy.. So she ended up forgetting she was ma. It ended up with the two of them just banging on stuff and laughing hysterically. Which was just as noisy as the fighting, but less scary.

If things continue like this, I might have a good porch story for Poop Week!

Take a Look Around, Look What I Found

This picture makes me laugh.

So Don't Forget Just What You Are

Hey Kids! Remember how much fun Poop Week was?

I've decided to make it an annual event! Get ready for September second through the eighth!

Even a crappy girl like me can only have so many poop stories before it turns into "Today, I pooped."

Help me out! Send in your favorite poop stories. If I get too many, I'll be sure to save them for next year!

And don't say I didn't warn you Grandmere et Grandpere!

If We're Evil or Divine

I'm sure I'm going to make some people mad with all this but here goes . . .

Okay. It's fine if people want to have kids. If they fulfill some need in your life, that's great. I even like some of them.

But please, don't use your kids for leverage.

The example I'll use today to explain myself involves work.

See, I don't really like my schedule. I work ten hour days on Monday, Tuesday and Friday. Mondays aren't so bad. We're so busy that I don't realize how long I'm there. But Tuesdays are horrible. The day drags and I get cranky. And I really don't like getting out so late on Fridays. Especially since at the end of the night, I'm just sitting there doing nothing.

So, back in April, I put in to have my schedule changed. I even offered to continue to work ten hour Mondays. But I asked for shorter days the rest of the week and to get off earlier.

The other day, my neighbor saw one of her friends walk by. "What are you doing at work so early?"

"Oh. I got my schedule changed. My babysitter decided to go back to work."

I usually try not to eavesdrop, but I was really interested. Turns out, instead of going with the proper procedures, this girl just went to her supervisor who then got the chick's schedule changed.

So, because I'm using the proper channels and don't have kids, I'm still waiting.

I'm not trying to be a total jackass. I know it's hard to have kids and get everything working together. I could understand if they did a temporary schedule change to give her time to look for a new sitter, but to screw all of us waiting in line permanently? That sucks.

I guess I'm going to have to squirt out a couple of kids so I can have some good excuses.

Breathe Deeply from this Envelope

Dear World,

If you don't know how to whistle, don't try to do it around people. And especially, please don't try to whistle in my ear while we're on the phone.

Cause the Welcome Will not End

I'm not a good friend.

I will lose touch with you in a day. Not because I don't like you, but because I'm a jerk.

I could probably go years without talking to a friend and not really realizing it. One day, it will just kinda hit me. "So I was talking to Pete the other day . . . wait. That wasn't the other day. That was like . . . Oh man! That was in February!"

I know. I'm a jerk.

I had this friend back in the day, Cassandra. She lived across the street and was really the first girl my age in my neighborhood.

So of course, I was kinda leery at first. This was my turf! But it didn't take long for us to become practically sisters. If I wasn't at her house, she was at mine. She was there to help rile my dog up. We watched Dirty Dancing a couple of hundred times and made up our own dances. Yeah. We were those girls.

At Christmas, we used to exchange presents. One year, I gave her and one of my other friends each a piece of one of those "Best Friends" pendants that's broken into pieces. We were that kind of pals!

So when she moved back to California, I was pretty sad. Cassie and I promised to write all the time. And we'd call each other when our parents would let us. You know . . . this was before the internet and free long distance.

And of course, I think I wrote once.

I got a message from someone on MySpace the other day. She didn't think I would remember her, but how could I forget the Milli to my Vanilli?

You know how sometimes you're really close to someone but when you meet again years later, it feels very awkward? And you can't really get past small talk? I have that problem with a lot of old friends, even in print.

But not with Cassie. She and I can still ramble without hesitation.

Cassandra's still in California. She's married and has two cute little boys. She seems to have some bad taste when it comes to dressing her kids. One was wearing a Cornhuskers outfit.

I was really glad to hear from her. I've thought of her often and always hoped she was happy and well. It's nice to see my hopes turned out right!

Hey Cassie--I still have my piece! Do you have yours?

We should totally start wearing them again! That'd be so rad!

Don't Copy This Here Cause I Done D-I-D

Okay, Doug. Before you tell me I misspelled "barbecue" I'd like you to know I did a little research.

I always thought it was spelled "barbeque" but decided to look it up and found it can be spelled either way:

Barbecue

Barbeque

So since they used the word "barbecue" in the definition for the word "barbeque" I decided I'd use that one.

But from now on, I'm pretty sure I'm just going to use BBQ!

Disconnect and Self Destruct One Bullet at a Time

So I'm totally awesome and everyone wants to be friends with me. Seriously. Everyone fights for my attention.

Okay. So not everyone. And I guess I'm not that awesome. But there is a bit of a rivalry between Casey and Jacque.

Casey wasn't especially excited when i started hanging out with Jacque. Whenever I would mention her, he would gumble something about "Your new best friend."

And Jacque's a little bit the same. When I told her that they were moving, she got a little pouty. "Now we'll never see you. You'll always be hanging out with them."

Come on, people. I'm a hermit! You'll probably see me just as often as you did before! And you'll be lucky to see me that often!

I assured her that I'd still come around. And I think she was feeling fine about it until Casey left her this message on MySpace:

"Move over Rover, time to let the big dog in."

It got her a little riled up, but she has decided to make the best of the situation. Now she wants to know when we're going to have our first barbecue.

"Never!" You see, now it's my chance to be jealous.

I can just see it happening:

We all hang out a ew times and everyone starts getting really chummy. Then Raw and Jacque will decide to start hanging out alone before I come over. Then they'll decide to hang out alone when I'm not even planning to come over. Then Chris and Casey will get mad that the wives are always hanging out and having fun, so they'll start hitting the bars together. Then I'll start wondering where everyone is because they won't answer when I call. Then I'll start driving by their houses and see their cars. Then I'll end up standing outside their windows weeping while I watch them laughing and talking. Then of course, I'll get all paranoid, thinking they're laughing and talking about me so I'll end up getting angry and pooping on their porches. Then because that's how my luck goes, a cop will drive by while I'm squatting and they'll arrest me. Then the poomongers will be scared of all the commotion and my friends, who are all new best friends, will write me off as a complete whacko. Then my cat will go crazy with hunger while I'm in the loony bin and he'll eat his way through my door and snack on a few people in my building before running out and disappearing in a blur of snarling rage. Then my family, shamed by my actions and guilt-ridden because they felt they should have known, will have to move to Kenya to work at The Gallman Africa Conservancy to escape the humiliation. Then one night, they'll be maimed by a frisky pride of lions. And then the aliens will come and blow up the planet.

Do you see the stress I'm under?

I know, for someone so hermity, I'm pretty needy and insecure.

But I have reason to worry. I've had several "Hey Meet my friend & Steal my friend" encounters.

You've heard about a couple of these. It also happened to me several times in Lawrence.

It just hurts to go from the middle man to the outsider. So, while I have this desire for all my friends to meet and hang out, I also am scared they'll end up liking each other too much.

I guess maybe I just have really good taste in friends!

Take a Look Around, Look What I Found

I think I have a problem with frozen foods. Apparently, I think they're so funny!

First there was this. Then I watched this and didn't start laughing until they brought out the frozen foods.

Glad You Came My Way

Raw, Casey and the girls are officially Newtonites.

Newtonians? Newtrinos? Newtrons?

They live in Newton.

I know. You'd think I would have been so excited and would have announced they were moving so close to me. I was and am excited. But they've fooled me before.

It seems like every time they came to visit, Casey would decide they were moving back. Mary and I would get all excited and then a few days later, "When are you moving?"

"What? Oh. We're not going to move down there."

And I'm pretty sure you could hear our hearts break.

I've been trying for years, even before any talk of marriage or babies, to lure them to the area. And for years, they keep breaking me. Even Mary had given up.

So when Casey called and said "I think we're moving to Newton," you can imagine I was a bit skeptical.

"Yeah right."

"No really! I even talked to the landlord!"

Yet, even as they started making plans and hauling stuff out, I wasn't ready to believe it.

Casey got a job. Raw cleaned out the apartment. Casey started his new job (and had to pick up trash all day--HAHA!) and still I wouldn't believe it.

I talked to Raw the other day. They are officially off their lease and she was setting up the new place. Casey was at work and Sadie was asleep in her crib in her new room.

Or so she said. I still won't believe it until I see it!

Or Will I Ever Stop Thinking About It

Okay, kids. Quit asking me how the PM Dawn show was.

Maybe if you had gone, you could have an answer to that question. But nooooo . . . Nobody wanted to be seen there.

So I ended up in Garden Plain watching a different two-person band. They were from Manhattan and the lead singer's name was Justin Something-or-Other.

Their friend had come with them to get drunk and rile everyone up. He was wearing a shirt that ready "Justin Something-or-Other Sucks." After he gave Jacque a lap dance, he reached out to shake my hand.

"Hey Justin! Nice to meet you!"

He looked at me funny and corrected me. "My name is Josh."

"Oh! Sorry! Your shirt has Justin on it so I just thought . . ."

"Nah, nah . . . That's my boy's name! See the singer? He's my best friend. Blah blah blah." Josh and I bonded over the Sooners and Gumby's.

Jacque's cousin Jill came over and I introduced her. "Jill, I'd like you to meet my new friend, Pete."

"Pete? No! It's Josh!" The poor guy was so drunk, he didn't realized I was just teasing. I guess drunk people don't see the fun in the Change Your Name Game, either. He seemed really hurt.

He didn't have it all that bad, though. Jacque's sister-in-law Lori and I saw a guy with a camouflage shirt and gave him a new name for the night.

We called him tree.

In the wee hours when everyone was good and marinated, there were some crazy activities. At one point, a bunch of people decided to limbo underneath a guy's outstretched legs. When a very blond boy took his turn, he needed a little support.

Instead of grabbing the guy's calf or even thigh, he put his hand right on the dude's zipper.

Lori was standing beside me. I explained what I had seen.

"He's my cousin!"

"Okay. That's fine. But your cousin is a crotch-grabber!"

She then explained that the limbo guy and the crotch grabber were cousins, too.

Oh. Yeah that makes it all better.

But I'm Not Sleeping, And You're Not Here

Dear Bankers,
Please remember this, you called me for help. So when I tell you what you should do or what you did was wrong, please don't get angry. I don't like to hear I'm wrong, either, but I've learned to deal with it.

Dear Wichita Drivers,
It is a really good idea to use your turn signal before you brake. Even better, how about you actually use your turn signals?

Dear Jacque,
Make more coconut cream pie.

We Only Want What's Best for Him

I decided that my high school graduation present was going to be a laptop.

I even made a big deal about how I needed to get it early so I would know how to use it. My mom took me to the Best Buy in Topeka, where she spent a ridiculous amount of money on a Compaq Presario 1070.

It was a pretty nifty piece of equipment back then. Not top of the line, but just underneath it!

Oh man I loved that machine. I got it home and opened up the box. I named him Nigel.

That's right. I name inanimate objects. Yes, his name is Nigel! Don't make me come kick your ass!

Ahem. Anyway. I used Nigel quite a lot. He was my constant companion for many years. But, I changed and outgrew Nigel. Kinda like in this song:

I could never bring myself to get rid of him, though. And a year or so ago, I tried to turn him on and he wouldn't boot. Some kind of errors were happening. I knew it was the end, but still I hung on.

The other day, I was doing some cleaning and throwing away of crap when I looked at my pal Nigel.

It was time. He was just sitting in a corner. It was time for him to go. Into the throwaway pile he went.

I couldn't go through with it. I can't just abandon my good friend!

So I did some looking around and found that it might just be a small five dollar battery causing the problem. The other problem? Finding the stupid battery!

After like an hour of trying to find the right size screwdrivers and attempting to gently pry pieces apart, I located the battery:

See that shiny silver thing with the black box around it? That's the battery. I had no idea how I was going to get in that far.

I managed to pull out the keyboard and yet still the stupid thing was practically out of reach. But some careful pulling and prodding, the battery came free. I looked it up and all the local Radio Shacks have the battery in stock.

So it looks I may have a ten year old laptop that works. That is, if I can get it back together.

Oh and if the motherboard isn't fried.

Happy Birthday to YOU!

Well! I guess this is one way to celebrate!

Girl You Got Me Thirsty for Another Cup of Wine

So you would think that a person who owns her own karaoke machine would have sang karaoke outside of her home at least once.

You would be wrong, though. At least in my case.

I've come very close many times. I've just never been brave enough.

Once, when I was back home, my parents and I were hanging out at a bar when the karaoke guy came in. I was looking through one of his books to find a song to sing and he kept hollering at me to see if I'd chosen yet.

Of course, I was taking forever. Those books are huge, though! And I love a lot of songs, so it was hard to choose.

I finally decided to sing this one:

Oh you know you would totally sing along!

When the Karaoke Master looked my way, I was all prepared to go up and perform. But when he asked me if I was ready, he was really mean about it.

I know, you think I was just looking for an excuse. But you can ask my parents! He was really really mean about it!

So he scared me away and I've gone live performanceless.

My manager, Angela, recently got a promotion. Unfortunately, that means she's going to Topeka. So we decided to have a going away party for her.

Angela begged everyone to sing something for her. Tiffany went first and sang "Strawberry Wine." Yuck.

A few other, really good people performed. Eventually I mustered up some guts (and some drinks) and threw my name into the hat. For Angela. The whole time grumbling "She'd better appreciate this!"

I'm pretty sure Wichita has never seen such a fabulous performance of this song:

We'll Eat a lot of Broccoli and Drink a lot of Beer

This weekend, I hung out with the boys. There were about one hundred gaming systems going at once.

Bret was playing Gears of War and ended up getting killed by his own teammate. I laughed because it reminded me of myself.

No . . . not getting killed by my own teammates . . . I was the murderer.

I'm pretty much a nerd. You all know that, right?

I like to play computer games. Sometimes I really get into them and obsess (see: UO.

Oh man it really feels good to get this out in the open!

For awhile, I played quite a bit of AvP. Most of the time, I played with my pal, John Doe.

Even though I'm a nerd, I'm not very good. So I don't really like playing player vs player. I'm always begging everyone to play in cooperative modes.

One night, John Doe and I were playing as a team of humans against a swarm of aliens. We were standing our ground in a spot where we could just take the aliens out as they emerged from a tunnel.

Sometimes it took quite awhile for the aliens to regenerate. I'm pretty annoying, so I was running to and fro, just to pass the time.

I quit running around and stood my guy right next to John Doe's. I faced him and then shot a grenade into his face!

A grenade launcher at point blank range! In his face! Oh the joy! The weird, nerdy, perverse pleasure!

I know it doesn't seem funny to most of you. Or probably any of you. But I'm the kind of girl that laughs for twenty minutes at a guy singing "Hot Pockets!"

I laughed a lot at the explosion.

John Doe didn't. He didn't find it funny at all. In fact, he got kinda angry about it.

It's not like it hurt him. He got to just come back alive and wreak more havoc. But even letting him shoot me in the face (numerous times) didn't brighten his mood.

To this day, he still brings it up. You'd think I had shot him in his real face! like anyone would really give me access to a grenade launcher!

For awhile, I denied the event ever took place. I was hoping eventually he would think he had imagined it.

But on this special day, I would like to offer my sincere, most humble and very public apology.

I've learned my lesson. I promise to never shoot you in the face with a grenade launcher again.

But I can't promise I won't laugh if it happens on accident!

Judge the Distance from the Ground and Pray

No, seriously. A tree limb just fell on me.

I spent the evening with Jacque and Evan, as I usually do on Wednesdays. We saw a storm was coming in, but I didn't leave before it hit.

I tried to ride it out at Jacque's, but it got pretty late, so around midnight, I decided to head home. It poured on me the whole way. The rain was falling harder when I reached home, so I just rushed inside.

When I got upstairs, I realized I had left my phone in the car. When the rain finally stopped, I went out to retrieve the phone.

Walking back to my building, I noticed the wind pick up. I stood in the middle of the street and looked up and around to see what the deal was. Then, I heard some cracking and wasn't sure what happened. Then I realized I had a strange sensation in my arm.

Everything must have happened in slow motion because all this happened and then I saw a giant tree limb hit the ground.

It took awhile for me to realize that limb had hit me before reached the street.

I had learned my lesson. I didn't stick around to see if more crap could fall on me.

I grabbed this piece that landed on my shoe. It's from one of the branches on the limb that attacked me.

Guess I won't be parking under that tree ever again!

Just One of Those Corners in My Mind

I am seriously disappointed in my friends!

How can you not remember PM Dawn?

They're coming to Wichita on Friday and I totally want to go. But nobody remembers them and therefore won't go with me.

How can you want to miss out on this:

Those moves? Hot!

I'm not kidding. You hobos had better start volunteering to show up!

And I Love You So Let's Watch the Flowers Grow

At the wedding party, the flower girls walked around handing out packets of flower seeds.

I got my packet and thanked the girls. They went on their merry way. There was a lot of ground to cover.

Since I was taking pictures, I was moving around a lot. The girls caught me and tried to hand me another packet. Not wanting them to run out of seeds, I tried to decline.

"Oh! Thank you! But you already gave me a packet."

The girls stood bewildered. Their faces looked up at me in an almost angry fashion.

Being awkward around kids I don't know, I got scared. "thank you, though! You're doing an awesome job! You look pretty!"

None of this pleased them and on they went. I felt bad

Back at my table, I noticed the girls heading my way again. I started getting nervous. "Surely they know they already covered our table."

Surely not! This time, I just took the seeds. I didn't want to rouse their anger again!

Later that night, Chad was sitting with us and picked up someone's packet of seeds. "Did you all get some of these?"

We told him we all had about ten of them. I guess I didn't need to worry about the girls running out.

"These are the prettiest flowers," Chad said.

"Are we going to throw them at you when you leave?"

Chad looked at me like I was crazy and laughed. And I was joking back then. But now that I think about it, it's not such a bad idea.

Wouldn't it just be lovely on your anniversary to go back and see a bunch of flowers marking the spot where you made your grand entrance to the world as a married couple?

That is, if someone hasn't mowed them down!

But Judy Left the Same Time

Today, I noticed my customer's birth date was the same as mine.

Well, she was quite a bit older, but the day was the same. "Looks like we share a birthday!"

Hooray for smalltalk!

"Oh really? My grandson also has the same birthday!"

Some people really want to share their birthdays with others. But I don't.

You all know I'm a little crazy about my birthday. I don't seem to get any better the older I get.

The last couple of years, I've taken a full week's vacation around my birthday.

I know it sounds silly, but I have to take the vacation sometime and this gives me plenty of celebration time.

Tonight, while I was talking to Jacque, she springs the "Can I ask you for a favor?"

Whenever someone asks me this, I'm always worried about what it is they need that I can screw up. "Oh no. What?"

"We're going to Maine from September sixth to the eighteenth--"

I didn't even let her finish. Which isn't unusual. I'm bad about interrupting. But I'm usually not whining so much. "That's my birthday week!"

" . . . "

"You'll be gone my whole vacation! My birthday!"

Yeah. Not getting any better.

You Can Hear the Ocean Roar

Speaking of drinking a lot . . .

Friday I woke up at sevenish. And ran to the bathroom. And spent almost a full two hours there.

No, I wasn't having a nice long luxurious bath. I had a nice "conversation" with a picture of Casey.

I really don't know what was wrong with me. I went to bed late on Thursday night and was fine. I thought maybe it was a delayed reaction from last weekend.

But now that I've heard about someone I know drinking several margaritas in one hour, I think maybe I was having a sympathy hangover!

Take a Look Around, Look What I Found

Wait. What?

Look out, Bobby B!

Take a Look Around, Look What I Found

I just watched this and the cat thought I was having a stroke.

For some reason, every time he did the jingle, I laughed a little harder.

It Takes Me Out of My Head

Doll was supposed to be my drinking buddy last weekend.

Normally, Doll doesn't want to play my reindeer games. "you're a big girl, now. You can go by yourself."

But we both had bad weeks leading up to the party last weekend and were looking forward to letting loose and having fun.

Unfortunately, Doll had a headache and wouldn't drink with me. Marcus and I kept trying to change her mind. "Want some champagne? It's just a little glass!"

She continued to refuse but much later in the night, she got to feeling better. Doll headed to the bar for some Patron.

"Never heard of it!" Keep in mind, this bartender (mostly) knew how to make a Black Russian, so he wasn't totally clueless.

"It's tequila."

"I just got back from Mexico and I've never heard of it."

Doll wouldn't settle for anything less, so she came back to the table empty handed and grumpy.

When we got back to the hotel, Marcus, Mitch, Doll, BJ and I headed to the party room to wait for the rest of the after-party revelers. I headed over to have a chat with my new friend, Malibu, while Doll got herself some Patron.

Doll is pretty hardcore. She shoots that stuff down and doesn't even flinch. It's awesome.

Marcus and I kept chanting "Doll! Doll! Doll! Doll!" as we ponded the tables like drunken frat boys. She drank half the bottle in less than half an hour.

When I decided it was time to head upstairs and into bed, Marcus and Doll came with me. Marcus was hungry.

"Let's go to Denny's Doll!"

"Yeah, Doll! Let's go to Denny's!"

We kept begging her. I'm not really sure why. I don't know how we thought we would get there. None of us was in driving condition. yet on and on we begged as we followed her down the hall.

"Listen," she said as she turned around and pointed her finger at Marcus. "There are two of you . . ."

"Uh oh," I thought. "Here comes another 'You're a big girl' lecture."

She turned her finger my way. "And I can also see two of you. I've got to go to bed."

I'm Gonna Set Your Flag on Fire

Crazy party fact:

At this party, and a lot of the family wedding parties I've been to, a lot of the younger crowd left really early and the older folks stuck it out.

You think you know how to party? You're wrong. Your grandma knows how to party.

I've Got Sweaty Palms

No! I am not some kind of perv!

Well, not always.

I've had many responses to my pervy bathroom pictures mentioned yesterday. I guess I could explain.

At one point during the party, I headed toward the restroom. I thought I saw KayLyn walking in behind me. I'm not a bathroom talker, though, so I just headed to a stall.

I had my mobile phone in my pocket and when I pulled down my pants (Calm down you pervs! It's not that kind of story!), my phone fell out and slid over into the stall beside me. The one KayLyn was in.

"Whoops!" I exclaimed as I reached under to retrieve my phone. "Is that you, KayLyn?"

"Yes!" She laughed.

"Don't worry. I'm just taking a few pictures!" I said jokingly. Jokingly!

"Awesome!" See? She knew I was joking!

Not to mention relieved I hadn't tossed the phone down the toilet again.

And here's a link to the photographs of the party. I keep forgetting.